Wherever you are is beautiful
I woke up to a call on a Friday morning. The type of call that doesn't spread joy or love but digs into your own insecurities from a voice you don't know but the message is a familiar one. One of "you're not good enough" ringing loud and clear. After the click, it echoes and the thoughts start rolling in, validating everything that was said to be true. There was a mirrored, similar phone call to this one a year prior that knocked me to my knees for months. I felt hollow and numb, masking emotions in a big grin and posting curated images on social media as if all was well.
I write this because it's not just me who has at one point felt this way. I write this because the message of loving people never tires. I write this for the one person still reading who needs an outlet. I write this because it has everything to do with what my business(es) is about - seeing people and believing they are worthy of kindness and hold extraordinary beauty by being true to who they are.
I've learned a lot about psychology over the past year. Battling between being too sensitive versus how to stand your ground while remaining true to yourself (ahem thank you real estate). Realizing that hurt people, hurt people and the cycle can halt or gain speed with me. Whoa. Is that not terrifying and empowering at the same time? In attempting to hide behind my facade, I started to see I was not alone. Sitting across the table from me over the past year are women that have a similar story to mine, each with their own flare.
The idea of writing a blog is not one of those items at the top of my bucket list. It's actually quite the opposite - hence my half year of stalling. I debated sharing anything at all as maybe it's not professional or appropriately branded [insert eye roll here]. After the journey we've been on, I couldn't continue the story of all things lovely without first showing the raw, broken heart we've come from in hopes you see who we really are at our core, in hopes you see the person next to you in line or respond to the caller on the other end with love and end the cycle.